Making a first impression. First impressions are very important! Read #9 about briefcases.

Don’t lose the only opportunity you’ll ever have!

By: Kimberley Roberts

Whether you’re meeting one person, a dozen people, or an audience of hundreds, socially or in business, you want to start the relationships off in the most positive way possible.
Research has confirmed time and again that it’s much easier to re-enforce a favorable impression, than to undo a negative one. Therefore, I have detailed the most important actions you can take to achieve that critically positive beginning – so you “Don’t lose the only opportunity you’ll ever have.”

1. Walk – The length of your stride and your pace reflect your demeanor. This is the reason to test out new shoes. For a social first impression, you want your normal stride at a relaxed pace. For business, you want a moderate pace that gives a confident look – above all, don’t scurry.

2. Posture – Your posture signals your confidence. Don’t slouch, and don’t be rigid; neither is flattering. Think of your body being held up by a string attached to the top of your head and your feet just brushing the floor. (Remember, the string attaches at the top of your head, not at your forehead.) Good posture also allows your clothes to properly hang on your body, so you look better.

3. Handshake – A handshake is the “finishing touch” to your first impression. When you greet another person, extend your right hand, keeping your eyes on his or her face. In today’s world, either person may extend a hand first, including a man to a woman. For women, be sure to take a ‘full hand’ grip and not a ‘pinky’ grip.

4. Voice – A pleasant tone of voice and clearly spoken words add to your credibility when you speak. If your voice becomes high pitched, squeaky, and fast paced, which happens when you’re under stress, people may think you’re ‘out of control’.

Should you start to feel out of place or uncomfortable, make sure to breathe deeply, allowing your vocal cords to relax. Consciously lower the tone of your voice and speak a little more slowly. Always remember that others will perceive your comfort level and confidence by the sound of your voice.

5. Face - Your face is your most expressive asset. The sparkle in your eyes and radiance of your smile will instantly send an introduction of who you are. This approachable look is important in a social situation. If the meeting is of a serious nature, keep your facial expressions reserved showing you’re capable and in control.

A lack of sleep will quickly reflect in your eyes and face; so it’s important to schedule your time to balance work and social demands, leaving enough hours each day for relaxation and sleep.

Now let’s focus on the things to do before those special opportunities come along . . .

6. Hair – Your hair frames your face, balances your body, and gives clues to your personal style and attention to detail. Make sure the subtle message it sends reinforces the right image by selecting a style that works for your hair type, face shape, age, and lifestyle.

Haircuts and hair coloring must be regularly scheduled so your hair always looks healthy. And if you’re a man who has a mustache and/or beard, keep the shape trimmed so it doesn’t start to look scraggly.

Conservative industries, and conservative areas of the country, require more classic styles. Even your weekends probably won’t allow for a wild new fad. What would happen if you were in banking, and one Saturday morning you unexpectedly had an opportunity to meet a potential client at the tennis club?

7. Grooming – Daily attention to grooming basics will insure you always look refreshed and energized. This includes lotion if your hands and cuticles are dry, filing your fingernails to eliminate any rough edges and maintain their shape, and if you’re a woman, touching up any chipped nail polish.

Your feet are also included in the process, even in the winter. On a business trip, you may decide to relax in the hotel’s sauna or whirlpool and find another traveler also enjoying it. After a short conversation, you discover this fellow traveler is an influential expert in your field of business.

If you’re a woman, selecting the correct colors for your make-up will enhance your looks, while the wrong colors will either wash you out or make you look garish. The stronger your natural coloring, the stronger colors you can wear; pale colors will wash you out. If your natural coloring is delicate, strong colors will look garish on you, and you’ll look better in the pale shades. Also, be sure to blend with a brush or sponge as you apply your foundation, blush, and eye shadow so you don’t leave a line of demarcation.

8. Clothing – Your outfit needs to be appropriate for the occasion, or meeting, in a color and style that looks good on you. Many people, both men and women, have closets full of clothes that no longer work for their current career or lifestyle. Evaluate every piece of clothing you own. Is it a current style that meets the wardrobe needs you have today? Does it fit correctly? The proper fit of your garments is critical to your best look, whether in a business suit or casual tennis shorts.

Your accessories are the small details that add up to give your wardrobe that finished look. This would include belts, cufflinks, ties for men and scarves for women. The scale or size of these items changes over time, even in classic clothing lines. So manage your wardrobe just like you manage other resources that are critical to your success.

9. Shoes, briefcase/purse – Your shoes and briefcase/purse are visually significant to your appearance. Your briefcase and purse, if you’re a woman, are a large block of color that is seen as you approach someone. To avoid a confusing or cluttered look, select leather for these items that will blend with the clothing colors you generally wear. If you’re a woman who uses a purse and a briefcase for business, consider a small purse that will fit into your briefcase, or at least have the two pieces co-ordinate to minimize any distraction. Also, carry your briefcase in your left hand when you’re meeting someone. This leaves your right hand available for shaking.

Shoes are not only functional; they influence your posture and walking stride. If you’ll be wearing a new pair, practice walking in them with the socks or nylons you’ll be using. Walking across a shoe store floor doesn’t let you know how they’ll actually feel in the long run. For women this is especially helpful if the heels are higher than usual. And you’ll also find out if the laces stay tied. With synthetic material being used in shoelaces, keeping your laces tied can become a problem. And you don’t want to find this out just as you’re approaching your new Chairman of the Board.

10. Watch and jewelry – These items will send a message, as well as complement your outfit. If you’re married, you’ll wear your wedding ring everyday; and you may chose to wear your college ring everyday. But depending on the occasion and the clothing you’re wearing, select pieces from a distinctive jewelry and watch collection that enhances your wardrobe, and is consistent with the image you want to project. A bulky sports watch doesn’t work with formal clothing, no matter how expensive it is.

Now that you know the top ten, determine which of these tips you need to work on to improve your first impressions. Take the time and apply the effort to improve yourself in these areas – you’re worth it! And most important - the return on your investment will be a lifetime of rewards.

A first impression can only be made once. To make sure it’s always favorable, follow the same approach actors and actresses use. When they prepare for opening night, they rehearse, rehearse, and rehearse more. The result of their efforts, a standing ovation.

You have the same opportunity. Try different clothes or outfits, including shoes; then stand, sit and walk around. Check your posture in a mirror, and test your tone of voice as you speak. Practice until you become comfortable and composed. Then when unexpected opportunities arrive, your natural confidence will be second nature.

When you know in advance about an important meeting or function, your rehearsal can become very specific. Practice in the exact clothes you plan to wear, carry on imaginary conversations with the people you’ll be meeting. And if it’s possible, you may even decide to go ahead of time to where the meeting will be held to become familiar with that location.

Ready – Camera – Action – Now you’re ready to make a powerful and lasting great first impression, and you don’t have to worry about losing the only opportunity you’ll ever have!

About The Author...
Kimberley Roberts has conducted hundreds of seminars and helped thousands of women and men find more self-assurance and confidence, creating greater success in their lives. Her simple but powerful ABCs of Success can help a person get more of what they want. Kimberley also writes articles for international business women and men on etiquette and manners for countries throughout the world.